New Year can be a bit like marmite, you either love it or you hate it and I used to be one of those that really didn't like this time of year. Reflecting back I can now see that the reason I really didn't like it was because I was focused on what I hadn't achieved, those dreams that had fallen by the wayside and unclear about what I really wanted for the next year.
So if you are someone who doesn't like this time of year and you can be a little hard on yourself about what you didn't achieve this year, then I have created 5 questions to ask yourself as you step into a new year. By completing these questions my hope is that you head into the new year with a slightly different perspective.
The best way to answer these questions is find yourself a quiet space, grab yourself a pen and paper and allow your mind to ponder on the question and see what comes up for you. Just think of it as a lesson for you to learn something new today.
1. What didn't work for me this year?
Yes you heard right. Our brains are wired for the negative therefore let's give that part of our brain some air time to capture everything that didn't work. Just spill it out on the page as it is much better on the page than ruminating in your mind.
2. How did I get in my own way?
Yes we all do it and we all have our own unique ways of getting in our own way. It may be that we doubt ourselves, we hold ourselves back, we procrastinate, we are scared of failing, we don't believe in ourselves. In question 1 you may have had external things that didn't work out but be honest here, how did you personally stop yourself this year. In order for us to move forward we have to know what we are working with as this is a great place to start your personal development. Trust me you weren't born with any of this so just know you can change any habit you have created and you can get out of your own way.
3. What were the highlights for me this year?
So this is the time to recognise all the good stuff. Write that stuff down and I don't mean all the huge highlights (although they do matter) but all those small highlights. We can sometimes be so fixated that achievements are the big stuff that we forget it is all the little things that matter too. Personally I don't think we celebrate enough so let go and celebrate. Give yourself a little fist pump for every highlight this year. Don't it make you feel good hey!
4. What do my highlights say about me?
Within all of those highlights are little nuggets of information about you, so write them down. Think about how you acted, how you showed up, what are your strengths. Were you brave, focused, energised, kind. Write down all of those qualities about you that made those highlights happen and know you are taking all of those qualities with you into the new year.
5. If I was sat here at the same time next year, what would I be writing down for my highlights?
Here is a great time to dream. Allow your mind to think about everything you would be happy to have had happen for you in 2018. What did you do, what did you have, how did you feel and what were you proud of.
I would love to hear from you how you found these questions and what insights you got from completing them. Just remember it really is down to you how you feel about this time of year.
Finally also don't feel bad if you don't have any New Years resolutions as we head into the new year. I really believe you can decide to make any changes or set intentions/goals at any time of the year, so drop the pressure and just enjoy the celebrations of bringing in a new year. In fact if you want to think about resolutions in a new way, I am going to be sharing with you in my next blog some alternative ways to starting the new year.